A few weeks ago, on a lazy Sunday afternoon, I and my friend were sitting in an Irani cafe sipping tea and having an animated conversation. A man sitting two tables away was watching us, I didn't notice him. After about half hour, as we got up to leave, he just waved at me and in a friendly tone said... "Hello, I am Narender, an Executive Engineer with the Electricity Dept, nice to meet you". and I responded, "Venkat, into Advertising and branding, glad to meet you". He waved bye, and we left. In my frequent visits to the cafe later, I never saw him or heard about him.
That was one nice encounter and reminded me of another incident. This was in January this year, my cousin from abroad had visited us. One morning on a walk at the local park, we ran into a bunch of five middle-aged men. They were having a hearty laugh while walking. My cousin mad eye contact and instantaneously in a boisterous tone said "Good Morning gentlemen!" They simply ignored his gesture and walked ahead. He looked at me asked, “don't people reciprocate here?” Well, I said, not really. We are made of a different thread. We don't meet and greet strangers. But we respect their space. He wasn’t convinced by my reply and I left it there.
Over the next few days, I tried looking into the eyes of strangers and was surprised to elicit a few smiles. Somehow, there was this strange feeling of how we treat strangers.
No, we don't shy away from striking conversations with total strangers on long train journeys or sharing few laughs with unknown people at the street corners. We, Indians have an uncanny knack to help people. Totally unasked for advice comes from strangers. Ever seen the number of times people knock on your car window to tell you that the rear door is not shut properly? The umpteen times two-wheeler drivers are cautioned about an open side-stand or the loosely dangling pillion’s long garment getting stuck in the wheel? Waiting for the traffic signal you find the biker beside you telling you to get the air checked in your wheel or inform of a flat tire. Numerous occasions we just stop by at a playground and appreciate an unknown kid with a “well played”! There are endless examples of how we are concerned about the well being of strangers, of humans in general.
Strange are our ways, we are different from the West. We don’t believe in exchanging pleasantries, but we show concern to the strangers, we are kind to them. Well, almost always!
No, we don’t greet the cabbie - the autorickshaw wallah or the street vendor with “how are you, hope you are having a great day?!” But we do address strangers with an Anna, Amma, Bhai, Bhaiya, Sir or even Boss. We respect them. Don’t we?
The advent of social media has brought a revolutionary change in how we perceive strangers. We don’t mind befriending unknown people – gender, age, social strata, nothing matters. We just get friendly, chat, share an opinion, pass remarks, comment and even fight. But there is still harmony. Ideological differences apart, strangers do get along well on social media. I have made quite a few friends through Twitter, whom I have subsequently met and bonded with, as though I have known them for ages.
There are pitfalls of this new-age friendship too. You get easily perturbed with the unwanted comments or unwarranted advice. There may be people who irritate you to the extent of disturbing your mental equilibrium. But then the World Wide Web does give enough opportunity to Mute, Block and Unfriend people. You can simply walk away from the strangers and continue your quest to explore the social medium through the eyes of more strangers.
So, here is something we can do as a social experiment:
The next time you are on a bike and see a stranger driving towards you from the opposite direction, just wave at him/her, sport a big smile and say a cheerful Hello! You will leave the person baffled for the entire day. You will surely leave them thinking - Do I know him/her? Have we met? An acquaintance? A former colleague? A distant relative? A Facebook friend? Who was that?
Welcome to the strange world of connectivity – Welcome to the strange world of strangers behaving strangely!
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1 comment:
Yes! Standing at a bus stop, if I wave and say"hi" to a stranger he will not only be baffled, but shall forget his siesta till his destination. This will certainly be a help to him to be alert and aware of pick pockets and reach his destination undaunted!
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